I just rendered my deer tallow in a skillet, strained the oil and soaked my patch material in the oil and folded it up until use.Works great without anything to stiffen it.I am hunting in the same weather as you are, and haven't had any problems with seating the ball or cleaning.I rendered some racoon fat awhile back, and it looks like it has good posibilites as a good lube, but it definately needs some bees wax to stiffen it up.Plain old crisco also works good, and if you like the odor a little oil of wintergreen smells good in the patch lube.
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