How to write for muzzleloader magazines and web pages.
With this simple guide you can write like an old timer, even if you wear a tie and have never handled a gun. Just start the sentence and select a different word each time you need to make a decision. Without even a computer to screw it up, you can produce an infinite number of different stories.
DON’T say “I went to the range last weekend to shoot my flintlock.” NO, NO, NO – use the guide:
Last weekend I (traveled, vamoosed, headed out, drove, trotted) out to the (bunkers, targets, back 40, woods, quarry) to (make smoke, blast targets, pop a cap, puncture paper, spark a flint) with my (smokepole, frontloader, rocklock, capcracker). (Ol’ Betsy, Sureshot, Buttlicker, Rattlebang, Bullpuncher) is the most accurate (firearm, rifle, gun, smokepole, etc) I own. She/He’s a real (tackdriver, holepuncher, centercutter, sure kill) at (100 yds, 50 yds, ¼ mile, whatever the audience will believe). (From rest, offhand, kneeling, prone, backwards in a mirror) I routinely get (MOA, 3 inch groups, 1 inch groups, one 5-shot hole, whatever the audience will believe). (My favorite load, She likes, I feed her) (relevant caliber) (round ball, lead pill, sabotted hogwash, fullmetal jacketed minie, homebrewed Pb PRB) lubricated with (Moose Milk, Cow Spit, Hopkins Number 9, Wonderlube, Ballistol, hand lotion, shoe polish, Mink Guts), (over, in front of, pushed by) (relevant number of grains) of (FFG, FFFFFFG, relevant number of Fs) (Sacred Black, the real stuff, traditional corrosive mix, Austrian, Swiss, Pyrodex and I’m not ashamed). Last year I (took, harvested, procured, brought down, killed, massacred, eliminated, perforated) (whatever number audience will believe) (deer, elephant, bull moose, squirrel, whatever game audience will believe).
