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Muzzleloader Joke

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jaybeach

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Looked all over for a good place to put this - I guess it belongs here if anywhere.
DISCLAIMER: This is a PC joke and is not intended to insult any religious or ethnic group.

Date: Mid-1600's. A young seminary student was walking along the path and met an elderly gentleman carrying a Blunderbuss over his shoulder. The young man said, "Excuse me, sir, may I ask you a theological question?" "Why, certainly", said the older man.
"Sir, do you believe in the sovereignty of God - that when your time has come, nothing can keep you here, and until your time has come, nothing can take you away?", asked the student.
"Absolutely", said the wise old man, "That is exactly what I believe."
"Well, sir, then why, pray tell, are you carrying a Blunderbuss?"
"Ah", said the older man, "I carry this Blunderbuss just in case I should chance upon an Indian whose time has come."
 
While I was studying in college (I got my degree in history, what else?) I found a joke book from the 1830's. most of the jokes were topical of the day ( like Clinton jokes) and made no sense to someone not in tune with the times. Please dont be offended.
The joke conserns a boy, his dog and a farmer. It goes like this...
A boy is walking down the road to the woods with a gun and his dog, at a fence post the boy stops to talk to a farmer plowing his field.
(f) Where are you going with that big ole gun and that dog?
(b) Im going to the woods up ahead to do some hunting.
(f) Do you hunt much?
(b) yes sir, I try to hunt every week end.
(f) you even hunt on sundays?
(b) yes sir.
(f) dont you fear the Lord?
(b) well, I always take my gun.
 
Edge Hill, the first battle of the English Civil War. Prince Rupert has his poodle with him

edgehill.jpg
 
An elderly man in old New Orleans would walk to the market every day and every day, the neighbor's big Catahoula dog would chase him. The old gentleman got tired of this and loaded up his hog gun to carry along so that was the end of the dog. The animal's owner was incensed and brought the ancient one up on charges. At the arraignment, the parish prosecutor asked the old man, "So, you mean to tell us you shot the dog in self-defense". Being a bit hard of hearing, the fellow replied, "Nossir, I shot him in de arse and den he jump de fence".
 
An old musket talking to a in-line....
"Back in my day we didn't have those fancy-smancy sab-boots and bullets wear'n jacket... We shot round balls and lots of em..."


A breach loader talking to a muzzleloader... "Hey there old timer, is that a ramrod in your thimbles, or are you just happy to see me?"


How many mountain men does it take to change a light bulb?
None, light bulbs aren't "Period Correct"...


A scene from the movie: On the T/C water front...
Two T/C muzzleloaders are talking to each other, an Omega and a Hawken's...

The older Hawken's muzzleloader says, "I could have been someone, I could have been a Contender..."
 
An old musket talking to a in-line....

A scene from the movie: On the T/C water front...
Two T/C muzzleloaders are talking to each other, an Omega and a Hawken's...

The older Hawken's muzzleloader says, "I could have been someone, I could have been a Contender..."


:crackup: :crackup: :crackup: :crackup: :crackup:
Being a TC Contender shooter, this one is really funny!
 
The brave patriots were sitting around the campfire at Valley Forge, shivering in the cold. Suddenly, the Devil appeared out of nowhere, glowing red-orange and smelling of sulphur. All of the able bodied men ran for the forest except one old gentleman, who sat quietly smoking his pipe. Satan growled at him, "Do you know who I am?" The man nodded. "Are you AFRAID of me?" asked Lucifer, to which the man calmly shook his head. "WHY AREN'T YOU AFRAID OF ME" shouted Beelzebub as his great horned head rolled back and showed his forked tongue. The fellow removed the pipe and replied, "Been married to your sister for forty years".
 

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