Muzzleloading Joke (sort of...)

[musketman]

A scene from the movie: On the T/C water front...

Two T/C muzzleloaders are talking to each other, an Omega and a Hawken's...

The older Hawken's muzzleloader says, "I could have been someone, I could have been a Contender..." :winking:

OK, stop cringing and add a muzzleloader joke reply, join in the fun... :haha: ::

 

[musketman]

Come on Zonie, Stumpkiller, TwoShadows all and others, this topic was made for your high caliber wits...

How many mountain men does it take to change a light bulb?
None, light bulbs aren't "Period Correct"...

I can type in bad jokes all day, wait a second, I mean wit...

That's it, wit...

 

[Doc Contender]

Young muzzleloader goes to the doctor. Doc, my throat hurts
everytime I smoke blackpowder at the gun range. Doctor looks down the young muzzleloader chamber and states, maybe you should give up smoking or at least switch to triple 7. ::

 

[Doc Contender]

From the good book of Lyman

"He that sparest the ramrod spoilest the muzzleloader"

That's all folks, going to work. ::

 

[Stumpkiller]

Why do sutlers wear onaburg galluses? To hold their breeches up!

HAHAHAHAHAHAH. . . hem.

Most of my muzzleloading humor is sight gags. Take my squaw . . . please.

 

Tourist,.... "Do those old-time guns REALLY shoot?"

Tourist,.... "Are you going to eat THAT,.. what is it?"

Tourist,.... "Wher did you buy your COSTUME?"

Tourist,.... "How old does a deer have to be, before it becomes an ELK?"

Tourist,.... "I have a gun just like THAT at home, only mine has a lever-thing on it!"

Tourist,.... "Look son, that man is wearing CAVEMAN clothing!"

Tourist,.... "I thought buffalo were extinct!"

Tourist,.... "WOW! a .54 calibur huh?.. I bet that gun'll knock you down when you shoot it!"

Tourist,.... "I've heard that,.. THOSE guns only shoot 50 FEET!"

 

[TwoShadows]

'n Brown Bess smiles demurley and says to her boyfriend(the tall slim squirrel rifle) "I think we're goin ta have a BB".......

 

You will thank me for this
(if you don't, I'm a liar)
the next time you cook
by the rendezvous fire:

If you want to live long,
if it's old ye will be,
don't confuse the black pepper
with the triple-Fg. :shocking:

 

are you guys part of an acting troop?
is that a real fire?
is that a real dog?
you mean you guys don't have electricity in your tents!
no son that knife isn't real, GOD I'M BLEEDING!
do you guys really sleep in those tents?
where do you go at night?
do you live in this fort all the time?
My grandady was a blacksmith!
my grandmother was an Indian Princess! (Indians didn't have nobility)
God, how old are you guys? I thought you were all dead!

 

[musketman]

You people are great, here are a few more to groan on, I mean enjoy... :haha:

An old musket talking to a in-line....
"Back in my day we didn't have those fancy-smancy sab-boots and bullets wear'n jacket... We shot round balls and lots of em..."


A breach loader talking to a muzzleloader... "Hey there old timer, is that a ramrod in your thimbles, or are you just happy to see me?"

 

An Irishman walks out of a bar.

 

[Rocky Johnson]

I once met an honest deer hunter.. Rocky /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/wink.gif

 

[Huntinfool]

I love all those questions of the pilgrims. One of my favorites is, "Are those moccasins water proof?" asked one wet spring day while I was standing in ankle deep water! My answer was no but the wool socks help.
Another is are you going to eat that meat!

Keep Yer Powder Dry,
"The Chuckster" ::