Camel Hunt

[Zonie]

I suppose this isn't the place to tell you folks about the two Americans in Egypt?

They needed to go to a small village 60 miles out of Cairo and did not have any transportation.

While walking down a side street they came to a Used Camel Lot.
A salesman came out and suggested they buy a trained used camel.

The Americans explained they didn't know how to drive a camel but the salesman said, "That's OK. I've got one here that's trained. Just get on him and guide him with the rope on his halter.
When he comes to a red light he will stop. When the light turns green, he will go."

So, they bought the camel and rode off towards their destination.

An hour later, they were back without the camel.

The salesman asked, "Where is your camel? What happened?"

The Americans explained, "Everything was going good.
The Camel would go on the green lights and stop on the red ones.
Then we came to a red light and the camel stopped.
Someone on the sidewalk said in a loud voice, 'Hey! Look at those two A.. Holes on that camel!"

We got off to look and the light turned green."

 

[Zonie]

The same Used Camel Lot sold another American a camel and he rode off into the desert.

An hour later, he was back, telling the salesman, "You sold me a defective camel! I want my money back."

The salesman asked what happened and the American told him, "I was riding along just fine.
The camel had been carrying me and my baggage without a problem when suddenly he just fell on his side and he won't move. I think he might be dead."

The salesman said "I can fix that."

They rode out to the defective camel and the salesman walked over to it.
He then rared back and gave it a stout kick right in the stomach.

The camel let fly a F@#t so large it created a small sand storm behind it. It then got up as though nothing had happened.
Turning to the American, the salesman said, "You can continue on your trip."

The American asked, "What was wrong?"

The salesman said, "Vapor lock."

:grin:

 

[Kapow]

Oh man your jokes are getting worse....

 

[Kapow]

Every now and again you come out with a good one! What about the blind man who picked up the cheese grater and said in horror "OMG that's the most violent book I've ever read!"


Flehto - I love America and I love Australia but the thing I love most is our differences. Kind of "same, same but different" as they say in Thailand. Imposing foreign ideas/practices on other countries is a recipe for disaster in my opinion. Hey maybe I'll get access to a huge camel patch and organise the inaugural Aust vs USA Camel cull.

 

[Lonegun1894]

If I had the time and money, mostly money, to be able to go on that, I would LOVE to participate. would even ask that it become an annual event. :hatsoff:

 

[Vaino]

One advantage between the 2 countries is that we both speak English....although I find the Australian accent troublesome. It's mainly the rhythm when some Australians talk rapidly. Of course, I also have trouble when many Americans "fast talk".

An Australian/American camel culling contest would be won by the US.....afterall, we've had much more experience in "culling" animals into extinction.

If a camel hunt were "fair chase" w/ wild camels, I think I would enjoy it.....especially w/ a MLer. Always wanted to eat camel meat.....wonder how the "hump" tastes. Of course w/ the Bactrian camels one gets 2 "humps" ....Fred

 

[MattC]

These are what we call "platform jokes". Some jokes provide a platform to make other jokes sound funnier. To 'elevate' them to Good Joke status.

 

[Jacko50]

A Mate of mine was managing a Property in far Western New South Wales. He is a Primitive Bowhunter. Camels appeared on the Property some Years ago and he has taken Camel with his Selfbow and Stone Arrow Heads. He reckons Camels good Chewing and a very challenging Beastie to Hunt as they are taller than the Scrub and can see a Hunter long before he see's them.

regards Jacko

 

[don hepler]

Mind if I step outside? I need to "Smoke a Camel"

 

[cynthialee]

I'd be tempted to kidnap a wild baby camel and raise it to be a beast of burden and a pet.

 

[Vaino]

"Babies" do grow up...and then what?......Fred

 

[Patocazador]

If you do that, you'll need to start wearing a burkha in order to stay in character.

 

[satx78247]

Given what I've heard from a mate from the RSL about the plague of camels, many of the local ranchers would likely HELP you catch one, a dozen or as many as you can afford to feed.

Incidentally, every now and again a wild camel is seen in west TX, the progeny of camels imported into the SW in the 19th century by Jefferson Davis.

yours, satx

 

[cynthialee]

There is a fella somewhere around these parts with a camel. He brings it to the fair every year.
Seems like a docile and happy enough critter. Eats and poo's allot. Doesn't stink as bad as I had imagined it might. Huge thing.

As to wearing a burka....yeah no. I'd rather eat glass.

 

[Wes/Tex]

There is a fella somewhere around these parts with a camel. He brings it to the fair every year.
Seems like a docile and happy enough critter. Eats and poo's allot. Doesn't stink as bad as I had imagined it might. Huge thing.

Fair warning...they do bite and spit. Don't think you'd like getting hit with a camel noogie! :shocked2:

 

[Kapow]

Camel noogie is the new anti aging skin cream. All the rage in Paris. Also excellent patch lube. I know a farm where they let a dozen or so camels loose. They don't really stray too far it seems, once domesticated. They certainly get your attention as you drive past. They fit right in here because they LOVE beer.

 

[tenngun]

You might try an American no hump camel...a llama.I understand they are all good packers and carry a lot more then a donkeys, but I,ve never been spit on by a donkey. :haha:

 

[Sean Gadhar]

You might try an American no hump camel...a llama.I understand they are all good packers and carry a lot more then a donkeys, but I,ve never been spit on by a donkey. :haha:

I used llamas once, Worked well, I would use them again. They eat about what ever you put them on. Will go all day without water. Gave no problems so long as the packs where even weight.

 

[Patocazador]

They fit right in here because they LOVE beer.

My dog would fit right in too. She'll go fetch a beer from an ice chest knowing she will get a small amount.

 

[Golfswithwolves]

Now THAT is some really fine dog training!