Bwahha I know what you mean, However when the little girl checking you out at the super market asks paper or plastic say paper.
Note: some of the big chains don't ask you as there is no choice. I always get paper from our local market at least once a month.
Don't have paper at all any more, both checkers and plastic are on their way out.
I now bag my own with reusable bags (that I love) and I check myself out, (which I also love).